Yesterday I was talking to some friends about how we judge people. About how we objectify, stereotype and categorize them. I’m talking about the people that we meet in social settings, as potential friends and peers, not like bus drivers and the like.
posted by The Wizard
Hey, I used to have a friend who was a bus driver, back off. I know YOU immediately stereotype people, or at least look for characteristics of a certain stereotype right?
posted by Tin Man
It’s easy and natural I suppose. Usually you can pretty much start with ethnicity and build certain preconceptions from there. I guess it’s sad but it’s also a fact of life that people need categories to organize things in their head. It’s a basic survival trait I think. It’s hard wired in. But for me, I rather like the people who seem to fit one stereotype but then have an air of dissonance about them that makes them interesting. Like someone who might wear big ass hoop earrings but seems like they wouldn’t.
posted by The Wizard
How quickly does all this happen? Over hours? Days? Is this on a purely physical style level or do you get to interact with them?
posted by Tin Man
This all happens very quickly. Like within a few minutes, the first meeting or so. I mean, you learn more things as you talk to people but I like trying to figure someone out right away. From purely physical shallow style attributes.
posted by The Wizard
Ah, you are what you wear.
posted by Tin Man
Close enough. I think half the fun of it though is to find out what niches people don’t fit into. Then again, some people come off as one huge stereotype. Those people tend to be rather boring. Or trying too hard. Or both.
posted by The Wizard
So when you dig deeper, what are you looking for? Are you trying to deconstruct them so you can figure them out and get an edge?
posted by Tin Man
No, not really. It’s just interesting to see how people are put together and to find out the reasoning behind how they came to be a certain way.
posted by The Wizard
So what’s your stereotype?
posted by Tin Man
I dunno…..you tell me. I get “loser” a lot, does that count?
posted by The Wizard
No, I asked what your stereotype was, not what you actually were.
posted by Tin Man
Ha, funny. Your third grade witticisms slay me. Not.
Thursday, February 28, 2002
there is black, sticky, smelly stuff on my knee and i can’t take it off. in an attempt to avoid surgery, my mom took me to a chinese kung-fu doctor last night. the chinese people have been around for thousands of years so we know a thing or two, however improbable that sounds. we go to his office, located in a garage in rancho penasquitos. no, i wasn’t afraid. he starts to rub my knee with some weird juice while chanting cryptic confucian sayings like “your present plans are going to succeed in bed.” yeah right. confucius didn’t say crap like that. he really said, “give me money cuz i’m poor, hungry and there are no sanitary wipes in all of ancient china.”
anyways, he could tell immediately that there was cartilage damage but he said that it was “no problem.” hunh? i’m all for alternative medicines (ironic isn’t it that chinese medicine is alternative to a chinese person) but i must admit to being a little skeptical. he took some various powders from off his garage shelf and started heating it up on his little burner. when it turned into really hot paste he slapped it onto my knee and taped it there. bam! kick it up a notch! see you tomorrow.
that was it. if all goes well, as he assures me that it will, i won’t need surgery. i’ll be magically healed very soon and i won’t even need a MRI (although i think i’m going in anyway). this might mess big time with dance mix plans but we’ll see. my friend tim was with us the whole time and we just kept looking at each other and laughing. he kept on saying, “that dirts the magic bro, he’ll slap it on you and make it all better.” ancient chinese remedies are funny.
course now i’m crippled and i smell like a conglomeration of everything chinese. wanna hang out?
anyways, he could tell immediately that there was cartilage damage but he said that it was “no problem.” hunh? i’m all for alternative medicines (ironic isn’t it that chinese medicine is alternative to a chinese person) but i must admit to being a little skeptical. he took some various powders from off his garage shelf and started heating it up on his little burner. when it turned into really hot paste he slapped it onto my knee and taped it there. bam! kick it up a notch! see you tomorrow.
that was it. if all goes well, as he assures me that it will, i won’t need surgery. i’ll be magically healed very soon and i won’t even need a MRI (although i think i’m going in anyway). this might mess big time with dance mix plans but we’ll see. my friend tim was with us the whole time and we just kept looking at each other and laughing. he kept on saying, “that dirts the magic bro, he’ll slap it on you and make it all better.” ancient chinese remedies are funny.
course now i’m crippled and i smell like a conglomeration of everything chinese. wanna hang out?
Wednesday, February 27, 2002
the asians are coming, the asians are coming
look, asshole,
crouching tiger, hidden dragon wasn't
our one shot at love.
it's the precursor
of what's to come.
"oh, hey, it's cool to like these asian people, as long as they're being asian on the big screen, and they're in asia, and it's a long time ago, and they're speaking asian (thank god for subtitles), and they're fighting and i love fighting, but some of it seems a bit far-fetched--thank goodness i saw keanu reeves do that shit first in the matrix, and who cares if they're kissing, as long as they're kissing other asians, i have nothing to worry about."?
wrong, motherfucker, 'cuz we're not just on the big screen in the kung fu flicks you adore, we're the ones who actually saw that film 5 fucking times at 9 bucks a pop, 'cuz we were amazed that our faces weren't on the big screen fighting in the vietnam war, and we're not just on the big screen lady from oregon. we're cleaning your clothes, we're programming your websites, and we're getting into your schools--for free. raise the bar and we'll meet it. and we're not just chinese. and most of the chinese are reading the subtitles, too, 'cuz it's in mandarin. and we're not just kissing other asians. our mad sexy asses are getting play all over the ethnic spectrum- how the fuck do you think rob schneider, the rock, and keanu reeves were made? and you know what? it's never gonna stop.
[continue]
-beau sia-
look, asshole,
crouching tiger, hidden dragon wasn't
our one shot at love.
it's the precursor
of what's to come.
"oh, hey, it's cool to like these asian people, as long as they're being asian on the big screen, and they're in asia, and it's a long time ago, and they're speaking asian (thank god for subtitles), and they're fighting and i love fighting, but some of it seems a bit far-fetched--thank goodness i saw keanu reeves do that shit first in the matrix, and who cares if they're kissing, as long as they're kissing other asians, i have nothing to worry about."?
wrong, motherfucker, 'cuz we're not just on the big screen in the kung fu flicks you adore, we're the ones who actually saw that film 5 fucking times at 9 bucks a pop, 'cuz we were amazed that our faces weren't on the big screen fighting in the vietnam war, and we're not just on the big screen lady from oregon. we're cleaning your clothes, we're programming your websites, and we're getting into your schools--for free. raise the bar and we'll meet it. and we're not just chinese. and most of the chinese are reading the subtitles, too, 'cuz it's in mandarin. and we're not just kissing other asians. our mad sexy asses are getting play all over the ethnic spectrum- how the fuck do you think rob schneider, the rock, and keanu reeves were made? and you know what? it's never gonna stop.
[continue]
-beau sia-
get in your car. slam the door tightly behind you. watch out for the little kids in the street and try not to kill them while backing out. drop the windows, pop in your favorite cd. drive. move your seat all the way back and scrunch down so that only your disembodied head shows over the rim of the window. grab a parliament out of the crappy soft pack you just bought and try to light it without taking your eyes off the road. and don’t burn yourself.
you’re reveling in this; the sunshine, the music, the slight buzz, the smell of life, the road whipping by. it doesn’t really matter what turns you take or what shapes you make, be it straight lines, loops or triangles, as long as you’re moving. but suddenly, you realize that you were supposed to be somewhere. somewhere over the rainbow, riding into the sunset, happily ever after, some shit like that. you were supposed to go there. you had a destination. the cell phone keeps ringing and you pick up and all you can hear is everybody asking, “where are you going? where are you going?!?” you toss the phone out the window.
in a mild panic, you start to look for road signs, fellow travelers, death defying bunnies, anything to place where you are. or where you’re supposed to be. you miss your phone. for a second you think that this is kind of cool, making your own path, following your own stars, creating something that is strictly “yours”. then you realize that you’re supposed be at that certain spot, at that certain time. and you’re already late. better get moving.
is this what you feel like too?
you’re reveling in this; the sunshine, the music, the slight buzz, the smell of life, the road whipping by. it doesn’t really matter what turns you take or what shapes you make, be it straight lines, loops or triangles, as long as you’re moving. but suddenly, you realize that you were supposed to be somewhere. somewhere over the rainbow, riding into the sunset, happily ever after, some shit like that. you were supposed to go there. you had a destination. the cell phone keeps ringing and you pick up and all you can hear is everybody asking, “where are you going? where are you going?!?” you toss the phone out the window.
in a mild panic, you start to look for road signs, fellow travelers, death defying bunnies, anything to place where you are. or where you’re supposed to be. you miss your phone. for a second you think that this is kind of cool, making your own path, following your own stars, creating something that is strictly “yours”. then you realize that you’re supposed be at that certain spot, at that certain time. and you’re already late. better get moving.
is this what you feel like too?
Tuesday, February 26, 2002
The Winter Olympics are over...when did they begin? It’s so easy to be totally unplugged from the world. Six weeks in England and i feel like i’ve lost all touch with pop culture. I am now a step behind and i feel inadequate. Even worse, i feel shallow for feeling inadequate. What happened on Friends? There’s a new season of Real World? Where is it? Who’s nominated for the Oscars? Is the Jay-Z Unplugged album hot? Has Britney been de-flowered yet? I don’t know the answer to any of these earth shattering questions and that kind of bugs me. Here’s what i do know. Sarah Hughes won the gold, we lost in hockey and my Celtics made a big trade. But i only know this because i read the sports page every morning (and the comics, Garfield sucked today, now you know). Beyond that, i’m a pop culture addict with a sequence gap. And it’s not so bad. My world hasn’t collapsed. I am still alive and functioning. Go me.
Hey Conehead and Chrissy: Do you remember this phrase? “One plus one equals conspiracy!”
Hey Conehead and Chrissy: Do you remember this phrase? “One plus one equals conspiracy!”
I’ve been told that i’m too cynical. Actually, i call myself cynical too, but only in a self depreciating kind of way. As a matter of fact, i don’t think i’m cynical at all. I’m a “the glass is half full” kind of guy.
posted by The Wizard
That’s an optimist. It has nothing to do with cynicism. Take it from someone who knows, you’re cynical.
posted by Tin Man
Being cynical would imply that i always look at the poor side of things right? Always thinking that things will turn out bad and stuff like that.
posted by The Wizard
Wrong again, that’s pessimism. Cynical is thinking that everything is #$@% up and beyond repair. Things won’t GO wrong, they ARE wrong.
posted by Tin Man
Oh, well, in that case, i guess i’m a cynic. But the thing is, i really don’t think you can be open and accepting unless you start off as a cynic. If you think that things are great and happy all the time and that the world is a fair and lovely place, you’ll only be set up for disappointment and failure. Things are messed up without any explanation, only by accepting that fact can we prepare our mindset to accept things as they are....
posted by The Wizard
.....shitty......the cynic is emerging people, watch out....
posted by Tin Man
Think about it, by being a cynic, you realize that people are different (and possibly flawed), for whatever reason, and you can channel that knowledge into trying to understand them. Being a cynic causes you to be less ethnocentric and more accepting in all respects. Then again, cynicism can be taken to a higher unproductive level.
posted by The Wizard
Yup, that’s called bitterness. I’ve known many cynics who are just plain bitter and want to remove themselves from the world. If the world sucks, they want to treat everyone else shitty because hey, if it sucks, why try?
posted by Tin Man
See, i’m not bitter, i’m just a realist. Yeah, i like that. I’m a realist, not a cynic. I accept the realities of the world and mould myself accordingly. Work the system, don’t question it.
posted by The Wizard
Ah, now it's clear, you’re really an opportunist.
posted by The Wizard
That’s an optimist. It has nothing to do with cynicism. Take it from someone who knows, you’re cynical.
posted by Tin Man
Being cynical would imply that i always look at the poor side of things right? Always thinking that things will turn out bad and stuff like that.
posted by The Wizard
Wrong again, that’s pessimism. Cynical is thinking that everything is #$@% up and beyond repair. Things won’t GO wrong, they ARE wrong.
posted by Tin Man
Oh, well, in that case, i guess i’m a cynic. But the thing is, i really don’t think you can be open and accepting unless you start off as a cynic. If you think that things are great and happy all the time and that the world is a fair and lovely place, you’ll only be set up for disappointment and failure. Things are messed up without any explanation, only by accepting that fact can we prepare our mindset to accept things as they are....
posted by The Wizard
.....shitty......the cynic is emerging people, watch out....
posted by Tin Man
Think about it, by being a cynic, you realize that people are different (and possibly flawed), for whatever reason, and you can channel that knowledge into trying to understand them. Being a cynic causes you to be less ethnocentric and more accepting in all respects. Then again, cynicism can be taken to a higher unproductive level.
posted by The Wizard
Yup, that’s called bitterness. I’ve known many cynics who are just plain bitter and want to remove themselves from the world. If the world sucks, they want to treat everyone else shitty because hey, if it sucks, why try?
posted by Tin Man
See, i’m not bitter, i’m just a realist. Yeah, i like that. I’m a realist, not a cynic. I accept the realities of the world and mould myself accordingly. Work the system, don’t question it.
posted by The Wizard
Ah, now it's clear, you’re really an opportunist.
I’m at work listening to an oldies station. So far i’ve heard the hook from a Nelly song, Missy’s “One Minute Man” and Peter Gunz’ “Deja Vu”. But instead of “uptown baby, uptown baby, we gets down baby, up for the crown baby” i’m serenaded by sweet sounds of “and your love was like a cornflower, blah blah blah.” Whee.
Monday, February 25, 2002
another fun test. do it. for the inner dork in you. or at least do it for the inner dork in me. go dungeons and dragons!!! "was that out loud?!?"
I Am A: Neutral Good Human Ranger Bard
Alignment: Neutral Good characters believe in the power of good above all else. They will work to make the world a better place, and will do whatever is necessary to bring that about, whether it goes for or against whatever is considered 'normal'.
Race: Humans are the 'average' race. They have the shortest life spans, and because of this, they tend to avoid the racial prejudices that other races are known for. They are also very curious and tend to live 'for the moment'.
Primary Class: Rangers are the defenders of nature and the elements. They are in tune with the Earth, and work to keep it safe and healthy.
Secondary Class: Bards are the entertainers. They sing, dance, and play instruments to make other people happy, and, frequently, make money. They also tend to dabble in magic a bit.
Find out What D&D Character Are You?, courtesy of
NeppyMan (e-mail)
I Am A: Neutral Good Human Ranger Bard
Alignment: Neutral Good characters believe in the power of good above all else. They will work to make the world a better place, and will do whatever is necessary to bring that about, whether it goes for or against whatever is considered 'normal'.
Race: Humans are the 'average' race. They have the shortest life spans, and because of this, they tend to avoid the racial prejudices that other races are known for. They are also very curious and tend to live 'for the moment'.
Primary Class: Rangers are the defenders of nature and the elements. They are in tune with the Earth, and work to keep it safe and healthy.
Secondary Class: Bards are the entertainers. They sing, dance, and play instruments to make other people happy, and, frequently, make money. They also tend to dabble in magic a bit.
Find out What D&D Character Are You?, courtesy of
NeppyMan (e-mail)
I hate the fact that I’m recommending a Jordan Knight song but “Close My Eyes” is dope. Culture Shock used it as a tribute to one of their members who passed away and the dance they did to this thing was amazingly touching. Who knew hip hop dance could have this effect? Download it, listen to it, imagine lots of white and lots of candles.
Sunday, February 24, 2002
When we go anywhere nowadays, it’s a tad weird to not have like ten people around. I guess a group of eight is generally a decent sized group but to me it’s just an average size. We go everywhere with 10-20 people. Party to go right? I like it this way of course, how we call everyone within the vincinity to do something but it’s definitely skewed my sense of social groups. It’s hard for me to revel in the prospect of going out without thinking there will be tons of people going. I don’t expect to have to interact with anyone not with the “group.” Heck, half the time when we eat there are tons of people and we all sit at one big long ass table. I remember eating in some NYC diner once with everyone and the looks on the other people’s faces was like “Oh my #$@! The Yellow Peril is eating here?!?”
It makes planning and execution a little difficult but I think we’ve gotten group-think almost down to a science. A messy one, but a science nonetheless. The key is to get everyone to speak up and gather a quick consensus of opinion, translating that into efficient action. Hahahaha. Yeah right. So, then you can try walking in one direction hoping everyone will just follow out of habit. Again, the success rate of this manuever is very low. Invariably people start to get impatient and some people start to mumble and grumble. One small sect will threaten to secede, in hopes of pushing the group into action. This only serves to add to the confusion as everyone really just wants to stay together as one big whole. By now we have stood on the corner for a good ten minutes. One person, or a few people, will try to proactively assume a leadership position but generally their demands for opinions are lost in the hubbub of the various conversations and laughter. “What? What did you say? Haha! Wait, -blank- said something! Haha!!! Maybe we should pay attention…hahaha!” Fun. Eventually, fear of doing nothing will take over and people start to say, “I don’t care what we do, let’s just do something.” At this point, one person will suggest something (which has of course already been suggested five to a billion times) and everyone will say “Yeah!!! What a great idea! Let’s do that!” And off we go.
Quite simple really. While this method certainly has it’s down home appeal, there has to be a better way. Maybe we should try to get everyone to vote by some method. Or we’ll assign group leaders who represent the interests of their constituency. The best method yet is just to assign a president for the day and to let him/her make all the decisions. But then the president would be under pressure to ensure the happiness of others. I don’t know. I guess if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. Patience is a virtue after all.
It makes planning and execution a little difficult but I think we’ve gotten group-think almost down to a science. A messy one, but a science nonetheless. The key is to get everyone to speak up and gather a quick consensus of opinion, translating that into efficient action. Hahahaha. Yeah right. So, then you can try walking in one direction hoping everyone will just follow out of habit. Again, the success rate of this manuever is very low. Invariably people start to get impatient and some people start to mumble and grumble. One small sect will threaten to secede, in hopes of pushing the group into action. This only serves to add to the confusion as everyone really just wants to stay together as one big whole. By now we have stood on the corner for a good ten minutes. One person, or a few people, will try to proactively assume a leadership position but generally their demands for opinions are lost in the hubbub of the various conversations and laughter. “What? What did you say? Haha! Wait, -blank- said something! Haha!!! Maybe we should pay attention…hahaha!” Fun. Eventually, fear of doing nothing will take over and people start to say, “I don’t care what we do, let’s just do something.” At this point, one person will suggest something (which has of course already been suggested five to a billion times) and everyone will say “Yeah!!! What a great idea! Let’s do that!” And off we go.
Quite simple really. While this method certainly has it’s down home appeal, there has to be a better way. Maybe we should try to get everyone to vote by some method. Or we’ll assign group leaders who represent the interests of their constituency. The best method yet is just to assign a president for the day and to let him/her make all the decisions. But then the president would be under pressure to ensure the happiness of others. I don’t know. I guess if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. Patience is a virtue after all.
This is something that has come up before but the other day Victor asked who is somebody we would admire or respect the most. For personal convictions, for action, for greatness of deed, whatever. Basically, as we racked our brains, it was a struggle to come up with names of people that we would actually hold up as people we “respect the most.” Nancy said that possibly the office of the president because of the innate impact of all his decisions but she brought up a good point that great things are expected to come from great offices because it is within their power to do so. Lincoln freed the slaves because who else could have done it? Also, in our current society, who’s warts haven’t been exposed and picked at?
posted by The Wizard
What kind of criteria are you using for greatness?
posted by Tin Man
I dunno. I guess it’s not really just respect as far as intelligence, courage, success or impact but just taking everything into account. I mean, Martin Luther King Jr or something might seem like a good answer. Or Gandhi maybe? But while they are great men, I don’t know if I would say that I admire them the most because they are great men who were driven by their capabilities to do great things.
posted by The Wizard
So what’s your answer?
posted by Tin Man
Well, Nancy said that in a way, it is always the common man who has to effect the changes. The commoner fought to free the slaves, Lincoln was great for his executive nerve but it wasn’t him out on the front lines. So I guess in a way, my answer would be that the strength of the common man would be my answer. Going above and beyond the call of duty. Fighting for something you believe in despite the fact that you are just “common” and not expected to do great things. A great man is supposed to be great. A common man being great is something to be admired and respected.
posted by The Wizard
That’s the cheesiest answer I’ve ever heard. Nice, but cheezy. It’s like the “which hand is the stone in?” question. “Neither!!!”
posted by Tin Man
Yeah, but it sounds kind of right. Even if it is one of those BS, skirting the real question type of answers.
posted by The Wizard
I hate people like you…haha. Trying to use the loopholes to sound smart. Wipe that smarmy smile off your face!
posted by Tin Man
You love it.
posted by The Wizard
What kind of criteria are you using for greatness?
posted by Tin Man
I dunno. I guess it’s not really just respect as far as intelligence, courage, success or impact but just taking everything into account. I mean, Martin Luther King Jr or something might seem like a good answer. Or Gandhi maybe? But while they are great men, I don’t know if I would say that I admire them the most because they are great men who were driven by their capabilities to do great things.
posted by The Wizard
So what’s your answer?
posted by Tin Man
Well, Nancy said that in a way, it is always the common man who has to effect the changes. The commoner fought to free the slaves, Lincoln was great for his executive nerve but it wasn’t him out on the front lines. So I guess in a way, my answer would be that the strength of the common man would be my answer. Going above and beyond the call of duty. Fighting for something you believe in despite the fact that you are just “common” and not expected to do great things. A great man is supposed to be great. A common man being great is something to be admired and respected.
posted by The Wizard
That’s the cheesiest answer I’ve ever heard. Nice, but cheezy. It’s like the “which hand is the stone in?” question. “Neither!!!”
posted by Tin Man
Yeah, but it sounds kind of right. Even if it is one of those BS, skirting the real question type of answers.
posted by The Wizard
I hate people like you…haha. Trying to use the loopholes to sound smart. Wipe that smarmy smile off your face!
posted by Tin Man
You love it.
Saturday, February 23, 2002
Traveled up this weekend to UCLA for Victor’s post birthday celebration. Cruised up on Friday with Nancy and Adam and after a bit of time at his apartment, we went out to a spot in Santa Monica called Gotham Hall. Some of the girls (we went with Mike, James, Irene; two of Victor’s friends, Susan, Ana; and Victor’s neighbors) fenangled us in for half price and got birthday boy in for free. As we’re standing outside, I could hear the music and it sounded really good so I started getting crazy excited and the whole first twenty minutes while we were getting drinks, the music just kept getting better and better (Souls of Mischief, Black Eyed Peas…etc). Then, of course, pretty much as soon as we tried to go dance, the music got worse and worse until the techno inevitably came on. Bleh. The place was very nice however, and it had pool tables and booths and a very nice atmosphere. The crowd was a nice size but a little quiet. I hate that feeling of thinking there’s gonna be some great music to dance to and then realizing that never again will hip hop come on. It’s like hearing a basketball off in the distance and getting excited only to arrive and see a couple of eight year olds playing. Nancy went to coerce the DJ into more hip hop but he flat out lied to her and said “ten more minutes.” Punk. But, the night was not a failure because Victor imbibed enough liquor to have fun and to pass out upon arrival at home.
The next day we had some dim sum in Chinatown (how many of you even knew there was a Chinatown in LA? Outside of Monterey Park? I didn’t). The dim sum wasn’t so great and it was all shrimp (I’ve never seen Adam eat so little. Ha.) and the ladies pushing the carts were very aggressive and pushy. Thinking that perhaps we were dim sum neophytes they tried to pawn off crappy dishes by putting stuff on the table while we were deciding but we quickly shot them down with a grimace and a growl (good job GaGa). After getting some buo ba (at Victor’s favorite place, with bright green tea boba) we attempted to go to the Getty Museum but the line was too long and we just ended up getting Didi Riese and chilling at Victor’s apartment. The whole weekend was filled with great conversations, about all sorts of topics and it was nice to get some time to talk about random bullshit. Next week though, we are definitely going to find some real music because this lump in my stomach won’t go away until I’m satisfied.
The next day we had some dim sum in Chinatown (how many of you even knew there was a Chinatown in LA? Outside of Monterey Park? I didn’t). The dim sum wasn’t so great and it was all shrimp (I’ve never seen Adam eat so little. Ha.) and the ladies pushing the carts were very aggressive and pushy. Thinking that perhaps we were dim sum neophytes they tried to pawn off crappy dishes by putting stuff on the table while we were deciding but we quickly shot them down with a grimace and a growl (good job GaGa). After getting some buo ba (at Victor’s favorite place, with bright green tea boba) we attempted to go to the Getty Museum but the line was too long and we just ended up getting Didi Riese and chilling at Victor’s apartment. The whole weekend was filled with great conversations, about all sorts of topics and it was nice to get some time to talk about random bullshit. Next week though, we are definitely going to find some real music because this lump in my stomach won’t go away until I’m satisfied.
i think this is incredibly romantic...
It's important, we communicate
and tune the fate of this union, to the right pitch
I never call you my bitch or even my boo
There's so much in a name and so much more in you
Few understand the union of woman and man
And sex and a tingle is where they assume that it land
But that's fly by night for you and the sky I write
For in these cold Chi night's moon, you my light
If heaven had a height, you would be that tall
Ghetto to coffee shop, through you I see that all
Let's stick to understandin and we won't fall
For better or worse times, I hope to me you call
So I pray everyday more than anything
friends will stay as we begin to lay
this foundation for a family - love ain't simple
Why can't it be anything worth having you work at annually
Granted we known each other for some time
It don't take a whole day to recognize sunshine
-common, the light-
It's important, we communicate
and tune the fate of this union, to the right pitch
I never call you my bitch or even my boo
There's so much in a name and so much more in you
Few understand the union of woman and man
And sex and a tingle is where they assume that it land
But that's fly by night for you and the sky I write
For in these cold Chi night's moon, you my light
If heaven had a height, you would be that tall
Ghetto to coffee shop, through you I see that all
Let's stick to understandin and we won't fall
For better or worse times, I hope to me you call
So I pray everyday more than anything
friends will stay as we begin to lay
this foundation for a family - love ain't simple
Why can't it be anything worth having you work at annually
Granted we known each other for some time
It don't take a whole day to recognize sunshine
-common, the light-
Friday, February 22, 2002
Finally we have some real San Diego weather. A Santa Ana (do the non-Cali people know what a Santa Ana is?) wind is blowing through and making everything deliciously warm. I’m gonna go pull on some shorts and run over to the pool and pretend to get tan. The last time I was truly tan was….two years ago? When we tanned on a beach in Barcelona? Lord-y. That is a long time ago. I cringe when I see myself looking all white and pasty. Uh. Even Jimmy, “Powder”, was darker than me for awhile! I remember the wonderful days when we all had nothing to do and could just run off to the beach day after day, slowly irradiating ourselves with cancer rays but loving every minute of it. I’ve had to substitute cancer sticks for cancer rays but maybe today I can get the best of both worlds. Wish me luck.
Two movies, two days. My mom wanted to watch “A Beautiful Mind” right after “I Am Sam” but I can’t handle two movies in a row so we went yesterday. It was decent I guess. I have an aversion to sappy, cheezy, feel good stories, the “triumph of man through love and feelings” kind of movies (you can tell this type of movie by the inspirational orchestral music in the backgrounds of key scenes) but I have to say that Russell Crowe is a great actor. So, with that in mind, I think along with Russell I would put Edward Norton and Brad Pitt in the category of great actors I would go see, irrespective of the type of movie they’re in. Oh yeah, add Samuel L Jackson to that list. Like him too.
And as a secondary list (because I’m not shallow, really): actresses who are hot. (1) Natalie Portman (2) Kristen Kreuk (3) Eliza Dushku (4) Katie Holmes (5) Jennifer Connelly. I think I would toss all my bullshit theories away for any of the above. But then I would only be a shell of a man, but given the circumstances, who cares? If truly, as everyone tells me, that finding the right person will make me toss aside all my misconceptions then I’ll start with this modest list of five as people I would knuckle under for. Big of me isn’t it?
Do you ever think about what you would do if you met a star that you really really liked? I mean, I for sure wouldn’t scream or ask for an autograph. Autographs seem demeaning to me and I personally don’t like bothering the celebrities for them. It’s akin to those people who insist on taking pictures of the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel (despite the no pictures signs) just to prove that they, they themselves, have been there. The postcards are much nicer, your pictures will only look like crap, stop snapping away. Pull that camera out of your shirt Hongshin! Ha. Anyway, I think that I’m going to come up with a great way to approach any of the above five, should that bright day(s) ever occur. I want to come off as smart, intelligent, witty, charming, slightly mysterious and not sleazy. So basically I’ll just stare at them mysteriously from a distance, trying my darnest to keep my mouth shut.
And as a secondary list (because I’m not shallow, really): actresses who are hot. (1) Natalie Portman (2) Kristen Kreuk (3) Eliza Dushku (4) Katie Holmes (5) Jennifer Connelly. I think I would toss all my bullshit theories away for any of the above. But then I would only be a shell of a man, but given the circumstances, who cares? If truly, as everyone tells me, that finding the right person will make me toss aside all my misconceptions then I’ll start with this modest list of five as people I would knuckle under for. Big of me isn’t it?
Do you ever think about what you would do if you met a star that you really really liked? I mean, I for sure wouldn’t scream or ask for an autograph. Autographs seem demeaning to me and I personally don’t like bothering the celebrities for them. It’s akin to those people who insist on taking pictures of the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel (despite the no pictures signs) just to prove that they, they themselves, have been there. The postcards are much nicer, your pictures will only look like crap, stop snapping away. Pull that camera out of your shirt Hongshin! Ha. Anyway, I think that I’m going to come up with a great way to approach any of the above five, should that bright day(s) ever occur. I want to come off as smart, intelligent, witty, charming, slightly mysterious and not sleazy. So basically I’ll just stare at them mysteriously from a distance, trying my darnest to keep my mouth shut.
Thursday, February 21, 2002
Here is everyone’s secret fantasy…to be sitting somewhere, be it coffee shop, book store, pet supply depot or park bench…and to have a random person come up to talk to you because they see something in you that piques their interest.
posted by The Wizard
You mean get hit on?
posted by Tin Man
No. Because as a guy, that doesn’t happen. Plus, that’s just sleazy. I mean just to have random people who are cool and interesting and who want to talk to you, if only for the sake of a few minutes interaction. There are so many cool people out there that are just waiting to be discovered (I’ve been reading lots of random people’s blogs recently) and there should be some way to know when a random stranger is a cool person.
posted by The Wizard
Like a system? Lights perhaps? The traditional green, yellow and red maybe?
posted by Tin Man
Yeah, that would work. Everyone carries a little light that glows green when you walk within the proximity of someone that you would get along with really well. Then we could walk through life constantly meeting cool people without having to go through the faulty filtration process that we use nowadays. It’s inefficent I say. We need to streamline our social interactions so there’s less chaos and less things left up to chance. We need to know, bang on, when a compatible person walks by.
posted by The Wizard
Doesn’t that strip away the magic of meeting someone? Of discovering someone? And how would this light system determine compatibility?
posted by Tin Man
Well, it would have some great omniscient power to look deep down into people’s hearts and souls and determine if they would get along. That way, there is still magic, it’s just systemized by a higher power.
posted by The Wizard
Wow, you could change the world. Actually, I read somewhere about this little pager-like thing that buzzes when someone comes within range who is compatible. But it’s only a dating thing. And it’s based on multiple choice questions so that might be a little shallow, this magic system of yours sounds much more intriguing.
posted by Tin Man
I remember in high school every year around Valentine’s day everyone took this multiple choice test and then you could pay a dollar for results and it would show the people who were 94% or 76% or whatever compatible. We need to make that a little more sophisticated and powerful.
posted by The Wizard
That might solve the whole “I’m single and there are no good people around” worldwide dilemma wouldn’t it?
posted by Tin Man
Yes, it’s an all-around brilliant idea.
posted by The Wizard
Go for it I say. We’ll make millions. Or at least say we tried.
posted by Tin Man
People would trip over themselves for such an item, I’ll go to work on it right away. We’ll codename it: “Project Cupid.”
posted by The Wizard
Very mysterious. Until you get all that worked out i'll rely on my old-fashioned system of weeding: stereotyping.
posted by The Wizard
You mean get hit on?
posted by Tin Man
No. Because as a guy, that doesn’t happen. Plus, that’s just sleazy. I mean just to have random people who are cool and interesting and who want to talk to you, if only for the sake of a few minutes interaction. There are so many cool people out there that are just waiting to be discovered (I’ve been reading lots of random people’s blogs recently) and there should be some way to know when a random stranger is a cool person.
posted by The Wizard
Like a system? Lights perhaps? The traditional green, yellow and red maybe?
posted by Tin Man
Yeah, that would work. Everyone carries a little light that glows green when you walk within the proximity of someone that you would get along with really well. Then we could walk through life constantly meeting cool people without having to go through the faulty filtration process that we use nowadays. It’s inefficent I say. We need to streamline our social interactions so there’s less chaos and less things left up to chance. We need to know, bang on, when a compatible person walks by.
posted by The Wizard
Doesn’t that strip away the magic of meeting someone? Of discovering someone? And how would this light system determine compatibility?
posted by Tin Man
Well, it would have some great omniscient power to look deep down into people’s hearts and souls and determine if they would get along. That way, there is still magic, it’s just systemized by a higher power.
posted by The Wizard
Wow, you could change the world. Actually, I read somewhere about this little pager-like thing that buzzes when someone comes within range who is compatible. But it’s only a dating thing. And it’s based on multiple choice questions so that might be a little shallow, this magic system of yours sounds much more intriguing.
posted by Tin Man
I remember in high school every year around Valentine’s day everyone took this multiple choice test and then you could pay a dollar for results and it would show the people who were 94% or 76% or whatever compatible. We need to make that a little more sophisticated and powerful.
posted by The Wizard
That might solve the whole “I’m single and there are no good people around” worldwide dilemma wouldn’t it?
posted by Tin Man
Yes, it’s an all-around brilliant idea.
posted by The Wizard
Go for it I say. We’ll make millions. Or at least say we tried.
posted by Tin Man
People would trip over themselves for such an item, I’ll go to work on it right away. We’ll codename it: “Project Cupid.”
posted by The Wizard
Very mysterious. Until you get all that worked out i'll rely on my old-fashioned system of weeding: stereotyping.
How do you react to people in a conversation? Is it 40% verbal cues? 30% physical cues? 30% vibes? You know those situations when you’re talking with people that you don’t really know that well, when you’re aware of every little motion and fidget. When I’m talking with certain people (usually strangers or acquaintances) I’m constantly doing an evaluation of how I should be standing or leaning or whatever. I try to look as relaxed as possible but in fact I’m concentrating on reading their non-verbal cues (interpreting another person’s verbal cues, a whole nother topic) so much that I lose track of the conversation. “What? Oh yeah. Right. Wow. Cool.” Nod head…..NOW!!! Shit, too early. Fuck, maybe next time.
I wonder how that comes off? I’ve been told that my face doesn’t emote much so since then I sometimes consciously try to exaggerate my facial reactions. A smirk here. A raising of the eyebrows there (admittedly not as cool as just one eyebrow but I can’t do one eyebrow so I have to settle for the combination eyebrow raise and wide eyed, relatively wide eyed, deer-in-headlights look). Does wonders I tell ya. I mean, half the time I actually am interested in the conversation so I want to impart that but then I start feeling like I’m being incredibly fake. It’s intriguing to note that I get the same feelings and thought processes, regardless of whether or not I’m interested in a person or not. And I’m always looking for an out in the conversation. Metaphorically speaking, i'm always sitting in the exit row. I tend to have conversations where I just spurt a lot of questions and then *silence*. I also have this terrible habit of not looking at somebody when I talk. Unless I’m comfortable with someone, I don’t like to look at their eyes and I have a tendency to look past them. Or to gaze around the room. This of course, leads to another physical sign of disinterest so by now I’ve trained myself to stare at a person’s eyes until I just can’t stand it anymore. I need sunglasses in all uncomfortable encounters. Or to be walking, that works too. An occasional sideways look of recognition is usually enough in those instances to avoid terrible conversational faux pas.
I also have this slight panicky feeling when my personal space is violated. I think about two feet is an ideal conversation distance. Any closer and I start getting claustrophobic. I don’t know what it is. People who I’m not dearly acquainted with make me very uncomfortable and self aware. The mantra I usually live by is to “smile and nod.” In every situation. Smile and nod. Smile and nod. Nod, smile. Rinse, repeat. But you can only do that so many times before you look like an inane idiot and have people start to question your intelligence. Combine all the above and it’s a wonder I’m not a jittering slobbering social nightmare. Or maybe I am, someone please tell me if I’ve exhibited any of these social symptons in their presence. I didn’t mean it. I’m comfortable with you now. Really.
I wonder how that comes off? I’ve been told that my face doesn’t emote much so since then I sometimes consciously try to exaggerate my facial reactions. A smirk here. A raising of the eyebrows there (admittedly not as cool as just one eyebrow but I can’t do one eyebrow so I have to settle for the combination eyebrow raise and wide eyed, relatively wide eyed, deer-in-headlights look). Does wonders I tell ya. I mean, half the time I actually am interested in the conversation so I want to impart that but then I start feeling like I’m being incredibly fake. It’s intriguing to note that I get the same feelings and thought processes, regardless of whether or not I’m interested in a person or not. And I’m always looking for an out in the conversation. Metaphorically speaking, i'm always sitting in the exit row. I tend to have conversations where I just spurt a lot of questions and then *silence*. I also have this terrible habit of not looking at somebody when I talk. Unless I’m comfortable with someone, I don’t like to look at their eyes and I have a tendency to look past them. Or to gaze around the room. This of course, leads to another physical sign of disinterest so by now I’ve trained myself to stare at a person’s eyes until I just can’t stand it anymore. I need sunglasses in all uncomfortable encounters. Or to be walking, that works too. An occasional sideways look of recognition is usually enough in those instances to avoid terrible conversational faux pas.
I also have this slight panicky feeling when my personal space is violated. I think about two feet is an ideal conversation distance. Any closer and I start getting claustrophobic. I don’t know what it is. People who I’m not dearly acquainted with make me very uncomfortable and self aware. The mantra I usually live by is to “smile and nod.” In every situation. Smile and nod. Smile and nod. Nod, smile. Rinse, repeat. But you can only do that so many times before you look like an inane idiot and have people start to question your intelligence. Combine all the above and it’s a wonder I’m not a jittering slobbering social nightmare. Or maybe I am, someone please tell me if I’ve exhibited any of these social symptons in their presence. I didn’t mean it. I’m comfortable with you now. Really.
Wednesday, February 20, 2002
Just watched “I Am Sam” starring Sean Penn and Michelle Pfeiffer. It is a sad sad movie. Of the twenty people in the audience, I’m sure seventy five percent of them were crying at parts (then again, of the twenty, 17 were probably moms so…..). It’s about this guy who is mentally retarded and how he has to fight to keep custody of his kid (an incredibly cute Dakota Fanning). The acting was wonderful and it was quite a surprise because I’d heard nothing about the movie at all. I actually can’t think of the last time I went into a movie blind because I usually read so much about a movie before going to watch it. Makes me question if we have altogether way too much information about movies nowadays, between the previews, the reviews, the behind-the-scenes specials, the media coverage and all that jazz. I have a great ability to suspend previous knowledge but I haven’t seen a movie with a totally clear conscience in quite a while. I never woulda watched it except my mom wanted to watch “A Beautiful Mind,” which was cancelled and so we watched this instead. Go watch this if you want to feel weepy and sad and happy all at the same time. And Michelle Pfeiffer is beautiful, regardless of how old she is.
Ah, happy birthday buckfutter! (otherwise known as victor)
Ah, happy birthday buckfutter! (otherwise known as victor)
Went out last night to eat dinner with my mom and a family friend, Arlene ai-yi (how do you spell that?) and her daughter Katherine. We went to Emerald and as any San Diego-ite knows, it’s one of two places for weekend dim sum. In all these years here, I’ve never been to Emerald except to eat dim sum. It was crazy empty of course, it being a Tuesday night. My mom saw all these family friends there and there was this one uncle who was my dad’s friend from high school or something, and a mother of someone we went to La Jolla Country Day with. It’s weird to meet all these parents and to have some vague recollection of who they are without really knowing but trying to pretend that you do. The Chinese community everywhere is so small and parents know just about everything about each other.
It must feel a little strange to be not of that circle, I mean, for other parents and adults. It’s like you walk into a restaurant or something and chances are you’ll know a few people but I wonder what it feels like to be an adult and not part of that social circle. I never used to conceive of adults and stuff as “people” with social circles and dramas and stuff like that. They were always just “so and so’s parents.” Being in England was the first time I’ve really had to interact with people who are significantly older than me. I had to see these forty-ish something people as individuals and not part of some collective “old people” category. It was a little strange actually but also very interesting to learn that "hey, old people are people too!"
Went out with Hong to a jazz spot downtown called Onyx. I was really tired and I almost fell asleep a few times but it seemed pretty dope. I like jazz a lot and I like listening/watching it but I was just out of it and had to just work at keeping upright. Will have to go back there to check it out some other time when I’m more alert.
It must feel a little strange to be not of that circle, I mean, for other parents and adults. It’s like you walk into a restaurant or something and chances are you’ll know a few people but I wonder what it feels like to be an adult and not part of that social circle. I never used to conceive of adults and stuff as “people” with social circles and dramas and stuff like that. They were always just “so and so’s parents.” Being in England was the first time I’ve really had to interact with people who are significantly older than me. I had to see these forty-ish something people as individuals and not part of some collective “old people” category. It was a little strange actually but also very interesting to learn that "hey, old people are people too!"
Went out with Hong to a jazz spot downtown called Onyx. I was really tired and I almost fell asleep a few times but it seemed pretty dope. I like jazz a lot and I like listening/watching it but I was just out of it and had to just work at keeping upright. Will have to go back there to check it out some other time when I’m more alert.
Tuesday, February 19, 2002
“As a matter of fact, the person who loves everybody and feels at home everywhere is the true hater of mankind. He expects nothing of men, so no form of depravity can outrage him.”
-fountainhead-
I’ve thought about these few lines for a long time and about the underlying principle of this idea. It’s a tough thing to grasp because I feel that while there ought to be immutable standards, people should be judged upon their own sets of values. That allows me to accept people as what they are and who they are. But, the logic behind this principle makes such clear sense to me.
posted by The Wizard
Well, it should. Without guidelines, everyone would live in a relative world and everything would just be okay because everything can be justified.
posted by Tin Man
But that seems so harsh…I mean, how is it possible to establish a set of rules for everyone? And who determines what these rules are? It seems a little arbitrary to me really. Do as you do I say.
posted by The Wizard
That’s all fine and dandy but eventually you’re gonna have to think that this kind of haphazard philosophy will only lead to people who are unaccountable and unreliable. The world will be thrown into chaos. There are actions that are just unacceptable. Objective rights and wrongs do exist.
posted by Tin Man
Well, yeah, some things are definitely wrong I guess, but then again, nothing is really wrong all the way across. Exceptions emerge from any group of standards. I mean, isn’t one love about loving people for what they are and accepting them lock stock and barrel?
posted by The Wizard
You can do that of course but think of it this way, in order to do that, you have to lower your morals and standards to the ultimate lowest point in order to have no expectations.
posted by Tin Man
Isn’t love about forgiveness and understanding?
posted by The Wizard
That’s where you’re completely wrong, love is about reverence and worship and glory. Love is not some sort of “feeble stew (made) out of sympathy, compassion, contempt and general indifference…” Love is “total passion for the total height.”
posted by Tin Man
I guess that makes sense but I don’t know if I’m capable of that, or if I even want to be like that. There seems to be a lot of judgements inherent in your idea of love. It sounds like love has be earned.
posted by The Wizard
Well, love isn’t free, it doesn’t need to be handed out to anybody passing by does it?
posted by Tin Man
I dunno, I’ll have to think about that one.
-fountainhead-
I’ve thought about these few lines for a long time and about the underlying principle of this idea. It’s a tough thing to grasp because I feel that while there ought to be immutable standards, people should be judged upon their own sets of values. That allows me to accept people as what they are and who they are. But, the logic behind this principle makes such clear sense to me.
posted by The Wizard
Well, it should. Without guidelines, everyone would live in a relative world and everything would just be okay because everything can be justified.
posted by Tin Man
But that seems so harsh…I mean, how is it possible to establish a set of rules for everyone? And who determines what these rules are? It seems a little arbitrary to me really. Do as you do I say.
posted by The Wizard
That’s all fine and dandy but eventually you’re gonna have to think that this kind of haphazard philosophy will only lead to people who are unaccountable and unreliable. The world will be thrown into chaos. There are actions that are just unacceptable. Objective rights and wrongs do exist.
posted by Tin Man
Well, yeah, some things are definitely wrong I guess, but then again, nothing is really wrong all the way across. Exceptions emerge from any group of standards. I mean, isn’t one love about loving people for what they are and accepting them lock stock and barrel?
posted by The Wizard
You can do that of course but think of it this way, in order to do that, you have to lower your morals and standards to the ultimate lowest point in order to have no expectations.
posted by Tin Man
Isn’t love about forgiveness and understanding?
posted by The Wizard
That’s where you’re completely wrong, love is about reverence and worship and glory. Love is not some sort of “feeble stew (made) out of sympathy, compassion, contempt and general indifference…” Love is “total passion for the total height.”
posted by Tin Man
I guess that makes sense but I don’t know if I’m capable of that, or if I even want to be like that. There seems to be a lot of judgements inherent in your idea of love. It sounds like love has be earned.
posted by The Wizard
Well, love isn’t free, it doesn’t need to be handed out to anybody passing by does it?
posted by Tin Man
I dunno, I’ll have to think about that one.
On Sunday, while the rain was pouring down, me, Hong and Victor went downtown to check out a dance show put on by Culture Shock San Diego. It was mad dope to say the least. The only difference that I can discern between most of these dancers and the ones we see in shows and music videos is that these dancers aren’t like physically super hot, otherwise, they dance like no other. It’s sick how tight they are. There was this one all male group called Formality that pulled out a little boy to dance with them. Needless to say, they rocked the house (they also won the most recent UC Irvine competition) and that little kid was amazing. Nuts. Dance Mix is gonna be so crazy.
One thing about I realized watching Culture Shock perform was that Michigan is the last time really that anyone will have the chance to dance/ perform in front of large audiences. I mean, Culture Shock is basically pro-level and they pulled in a nice amount but it was only about 400 or so people. It’s overwhelming to realize that at Mich, depending on the venue, there are sometimes a thousand people in the audience. That’s sad because….well, all the old people know, it just doesn’t get any better than that.
On the plus front, I went to get my knee checked out today and I’ll have to get a MRI on it. The doctor thinks that it’s cartilage and if so, my diabolical plans will work out to perfection. I’ll be in SD until early March and then a trip to Boston for a week. A few days after, I can have a knee scope, after that I can recover for two weeks….and then I can go to Dance Mix before China!!! Yah!!! We’ll see what happens. Don’t want to get my hopes up just quite yet.
One thing about I realized watching Culture Shock perform was that Michigan is the last time really that anyone will have the chance to dance/ perform in front of large audiences. I mean, Culture Shock is basically pro-level and they pulled in a nice amount but it was only about 400 or so people. It’s overwhelming to realize that at Mich, depending on the venue, there are sometimes a thousand people in the audience. That’s sad because….well, all the old people know, it just doesn’t get any better than that.
On the plus front, I went to get my knee checked out today and I’ll have to get a MRI on it. The doctor thinks that it’s cartilage and if so, my diabolical plans will work out to perfection. I’ll be in SD until early March and then a trip to Boston for a week. A few days after, I can have a knee scope, after that I can recover for two weeks….and then I can go to Dance Mix before China!!! Yah!!! We’ll see what happens. Don’t want to get my hopes up just quite yet.
Monday, February 18, 2002
(on how to kill a man’s integrity and his soul)
"Preach selfishness. Tell man that he must live for others. Tell men that altruism is the ideal. Not a single one of them has ever achieved it and not a single one ever will. His every living instinct screams against it. But don’t you see what you accomplish? Man realizes that he’s incapable of what he’s accepted as the noblest virtue- and it gives him a sense of guilt, of sin, of his own basic unworthiness. Since the supreme ideal is beyond his grasp, he gives up eventually all ideals, all aspiration, all sense of his personal value. He feels himself obliged to preach what he can’t practice. But one can’t be good halfway or honest approximately. To preserve one’s integrity is a hard battle. Why preserve that which one knows to be corrupt already? His soul gives up it’s self-respect. You’ve got him. He’ll obey. He’ll be glad to obey- because he can’t trust himself, he feels uncertain, he feels unclean. That's one way."
-the fountainhead-
posted by Tin Man
Um, can this be right?
"Preach selfishness. Tell man that he must live for others. Tell men that altruism is the ideal. Not a single one of them has ever achieved it and not a single one ever will. His every living instinct screams against it. But don’t you see what you accomplish? Man realizes that he’s incapable of what he’s accepted as the noblest virtue- and it gives him a sense of guilt, of sin, of his own basic unworthiness. Since the supreme ideal is beyond his grasp, he gives up eventually all ideals, all aspiration, all sense of his personal value. He feels himself obliged to preach what he can’t practice. But one can’t be good halfway or honest approximately. To preserve one’s integrity is a hard battle. Why preserve that which one knows to be corrupt already? His soul gives up it’s self-respect. You’ve got him. He’ll obey. He’ll be glad to obey- because he can’t trust himself, he feels uncertain, he feels unclean. That's one way."
-the fountainhead-
posted by Tin Man
Um, can this be right?
Well, I’m back from England. Are things different? Nope. Not really. San Diego is freakishly cold. I actually do kind of miss England a little bit. It wasn’t terribly boring and it wasn’t terribly exciting. It just was. I think I’ve learned a lot and at the very least I think I’ve gotten a perspective of the UK that few people will be able to because I lived in the country and everything. Having said all that, I’m ecstatic to be back. I’m not sure how soon I’m gonna have to go so for now I’m not switching on my cell (plus the $75 overdue bill is a deterrent).
As soon as I got home, I got a bite to eat and then played some Starcraft with my little cousin. He’s hilarious because everytime he comes over he just wants to watch me play Starcraft and all I do is enter cheat codes and he thinks I’m a god. Ah, naivette is great. James, Victor, Pan, Des and Adam came over to pick me up after that and we immediately went downtown to Fumari’s. Well, we were supposed to go to Fumari’s. Instead, James saw an ex-girlfriend there and freaked out and we had to go play pool for an hour until he was sure she left. I remember this particular psycho girlfriend from high school and I guess James had good reason to run and it was funny watching his quiet panic. Ha.
It was nice to sit in a car without hearing every little bump in the road actually. You know that feeling when you get back from somewhere? Regardless of long ago it was? Like you never left and the past however much time was just a dream? That’s what I feel like right now, like England is really really far away. It’s a comfortable feeling I guess.
As soon as I got home, I got a bite to eat and then played some Starcraft with my little cousin. He’s hilarious because everytime he comes over he just wants to watch me play Starcraft and all I do is enter cheat codes and he thinks I’m a god. Ah, naivette is great. James, Victor, Pan, Des and Adam came over to pick me up after that and we immediately went downtown to Fumari’s. Well, we were supposed to go to Fumari’s. Instead, James saw an ex-girlfriend there and freaked out and we had to go play pool for an hour until he was sure she left. I remember this particular psycho girlfriend from high school and I guess James had good reason to run and it was funny watching his quiet panic. Ha.
It was nice to sit in a car without hearing every little bump in the road actually. You know that feeling when you get back from somewhere? Regardless of long ago it was? Like you never left and the past however much time was just a dream? That’s what I feel like right now, like England is really really far away. It’s a comfortable feeling I guess.
Sunday, February 17, 2002
-Do not stand at my grave and weep-
Do not stand at my grave and weep;
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in cirled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.
-anonymous-
Do not stand at my grave and weep;
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in cirled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.
-anonymous-
Friday, February 15, 2002
Thursday, February 14, 2002
Well, since I figured I’d be leaving England in two days, I might as well treat myself to something with my hard earned money.
posted by The Wizard
Really? I thought you blew it all already? What can you possibly afford to buy?
posted by Tin Man
I went into an Oxfam book store that sells only donated books, so consequently, the books are mad cheap. For just around 10£ I got: a large paperback version of Tides of War, The Art of the Dragonlance Saga, the Cliff Notes version of Walden and a cool little Bible that has this dope metal clasp mechanism.
posted by The Wizard
My my, that’s quite a splurge for a young man like you.
posted by Tin Man
But wait…there’s more. The coup was a £1.99 VHS copy of “Care Bears: Making Friends.” How hot is that?
posted by The Wizard
*stunned silence*
posted by Tin Man
They had “My Little Pony” too but I figured I’d better pass on that. Admit it, you’re jealous.
posted by The Wizard
Words escape me.
posted by The Wizard
Really? I thought you blew it all already? What can you possibly afford to buy?
posted by Tin Man
I went into an Oxfam book store that sells only donated books, so consequently, the books are mad cheap. For just around 10£ I got: a large paperback version of Tides of War, The Art of the Dragonlance Saga, the Cliff Notes version of Walden and a cool little Bible that has this dope metal clasp mechanism.
posted by The Wizard
My my, that’s quite a splurge for a young man like you.
posted by Tin Man
But wait…there’s more. The coup was a £1.99 VHS copy of “Care Bears: Making Friends.” How hot is that?
posted by The Wizard
*stunned silence*
posted by Tin Man
They had “My Little Pony” too but I figured I’d better pass on that. Admit it, you’re jealous.
posted by The Wizard
Words escape me.
Wednesday, February 13, 2002
Today i am writing the report that will change the world. Well, the flute world anyway. I am trying to compile all the things i've learned in the last five weeks into one cohesive report that will allow me to identify what i've learned and also any weaknesses i might have seen. Daunting isn't it? Basically i'm just spewing forth anything i've seen or heard the last five weeks and trying to organize it. And from this i'll soon be able to determine what i'll be doing in the coming months. Ha. Yeah right.
excerpt from
and these are only some of the things i believe
and i believe pinky and the brain are revolutionaries
because they try to take over the world- every night
like them, i believe there will always be something to fight for
-staceyann chin-
and these are only some of the things i believe
and i believe pinky and the brain are revolutionaries
because they try to take over the world- every night
like them, i believe there will always be something to fight for
-staceyann chin-
Tuesday, February 12, 2002
I’ve learned this past weekend that liberal arts colleges are a very different place. I went to a huge 30,000 person (it would be a sham to say 30,000 students) university. Michigan is a top public school, full of too many people caught up in their own little worlds. I feel like a liberal arts education kind of makes you more worldly. That’s the point obviously of a liberal education. Of course, there are many people I know from big schools that have a sense of awareness but that is only if they go looking for it. People from liberal arts colleges seem like they have to know more…more about history, more about theory, more about how the world connects and interacts, more stuff. Now, I don’t know many people from liberal arts colleges so I can only generalize and make assumptions based on my own perceptions and conceptions. I’m very glad I went to a huge school but I do wonder about what having a liberal education would have been like.
A question I have is how much of a product we are of our universities. Obviously, by choosing a particular college, people are already making a preference even before they arrive at campus but I wonder if being at a specific institution reinforces or constructs. Surrounding yourself with the same types of people enhances and sharpens you but it can also be a creative force, nudging you in directions that may or may not be really “you.” I think going to any different campus would make a dramatic effect on people because each campus breeds it’s own culture and bubble in which to live in. It’s like, all my friends are like THIS so it’s hard to conceptualise something else but for someone at a small private college, their bubble is entirely different. Once again, I am rambling but let me leave you with this pearl of wisdom.....
Gentrification is a very popular word at liberal arts colleges. Everything is related to gentrification. Learn it, use it, sound smart, break out of your public school shell, be liberal.....
A question I have is how much of a product we are of our universities. Obviously, by choosing a particular college, people are already making a preference even before they arrive at campus but I wonder if being at a specific institution reinforces or constructs. Surrounding yourself with the same types of people enhances and sharpens you but it can also be a creative force, nudging you in directions that may or may not be really “you.” I think going to any different campus would make a dramatic effect on people because each campus breeds it’s own culture and bubble in which to live in. It’s like, all my friends are like THIS so it’s hard to conceptualise something else but for someone at a small private college, their bubble is entirely different. Once again, I am rambling but let me leave you with this pearl of wisdom.....
Gentrification is a very popular word at liberal arts colleges. Everything is related to gentrification. Learn it, use it, sound smart, break out of your public school shell, be liberal.....
Dude, it must suck to be ordinary.
posted by The Wizard
My my aren’t we making some big headed statements today! I hope you are including yourself into this “ordinary” category otherwise I’d have to say that you’re a big snob.
posted by Tin Man
Fine, call me a snob, call me delusional but some people are just incredibly boring. Stereotypical outsides meshed with stereotypical insides. It’s like biting into an Oreo and finding not cream on the inside but just more cookie. Disappointing.
posted by The Wizard
Nice analogy there Mr Un-ordinary...
posted by Tin Man
Thank you. I mean, sometimes people just seem incredibly blah. They don’t say anything interesting, nothing intrigues you about them and you can’t think of a single thing to ask or talk about.
posted by The Wizard
I suppose because many people are ordinary we get that subset of ordinary people who are ordinary people dressed up as exciting people.
posted by Tin Man
Yeah, I found out those people are called “artists.” People who try too damn hard to be something. Anything.
posted by The Wizard
It’s a bit unfair to label them “artists.” Let’s go with the equally appropriate but more universal label of “posers.”
posted by Tin Man
We’re starting to get off track here, I don’t want to talk about the people who try too hard but rather keep our focus on the people who are just….plain. Like vanilla. I try to muster the mental capacity to be intrigued by ordinary folks but I find it intensely frustrating.
posted by The Wizard
You know what's funny? I find talking to you intensely frustrating...does that mean you're ordinary? I mean, you use trite sayings like "plain, like vanilla." I find that pretty ordinary.
posted by Tin Man
I can see this is gonna be going nowhere.
posted by The Wizard
Yeah, and it's boring.
posted by The Wizard
My my aren’t we making some big headed statements today! I hope you are including yourself into this “ordinary” category otherwise I’d have to say that you’re a big snob.
posted by Tin Man
Fine, call me a snob, call me delusional but some people are just incredibly boring. Stereotypical outsides meshed with stereotypical insides. It’s like biting into an Oreo and finding not cream on the inside but just more cookie. Disappointing.
posted by The Wizard
Nice analogy there Mr Un-ordinary...
posted by Tin Man
Thank you. I mean, sometimes people just seem incredibly blah. They don’t say anything interesting, nothing intrigues you about them and you can’t think of a single thing to ask or talk about.
posted by The Wizard
I suppose because many people are ordinary we get that subset of ordinary people who are ordinary people dressed up as exciting people.
posted by Tin Man
Yeah, I found out those people are called “artists.” People who try too damn hard to be something. Anything.
posted by The Wizard
It’s a bit unfair to label them “artists.” Let’s go with the equally appropriate but more universal label of “posers.”
posted by Tin Man
We’re starting to get off track here, I don’t want to talk about the people who try too hard but rather keep our focus on the people who are just….plain. Like vanilla. I try to muster the mental capacity to be intrigued by ordinary folks but I find it intensely frustrating.
posted by The Wizard
You know what's funny? I find talking to you intensely frustrating...does that mean you're ordinary? I mean, you use trite sayings like "plain, like vanilla." I find that pretty ordinary.
posted by Tin Man
I can see this is gonna be going nowhere.
posted by The Wizard
Yeah, and it's boring.
Monday, February 11, 2002
On Thursday night, Robin dropped me off in Glasgow so i could spend the weekend hanging out with Mary at the Glasgow School of Art. (Oh, girls with Scottish accents are dope) I was damn excited to see Mary because i knew this would be a couple days where i could just bum out and do whatever. Her roommates and friends were pretty cool and i guess my perception of an “art school” was a little different (i was expecting everyone to be an “artiste”). And just about everyone was from the US which was comforting in a way. That very first night we went out to a bar called Revolution with tacky sickle and hammer Communist motifs and stars and a refrigerator with Che Guevara frosted into the glass (“revolution” Get it? Aaaaaah). It was okay but a tad too New York-y for a bar in the middle of Scotland. Afterwards we went to The Vic, a club for the Glasgow students that had.....hip hop.....good hip hop. Wow. I was in heaven. Beer was cheap, cigarettes were allowed indoors, the music was really really good, there was room to dance.....what more did i really need? Needless to say, it was fun fun fun and much needed. Let me say this, English/Scottish/white people cannot dance. Not a pinch. I’ve never seen such a large room filled to the brim with bad dancers, heck, even the girls could barely move. Ha.
Anyhow, Friday and Saturday were exploring days. Me, Mary and Mimi (one of Mary’s roommates) tried to go see the Necropolis (essentially a giant big graveyard) in Glasgow but it was closed so we explored the church and the museum. It was a small religious museum and it was small but filled with interesting things, it also had the original of a Dali painting of Jesus on the cross that is really dope. Saturday, we took the bus to Edinburgh and walked around all over the place to look at sites like Edinburgh Castle, the Scottish Crown Jewels (including the “Stone of Destiny” which was basically a very underwhelming chunk of rock. Whee), part of what was supposed to be a copy of the Parthenon (but it ran out of funding and now it’s just a couple of big Roman columns), the tomb of philosopher David Hume and the nearby pubs and streets. It was a long day of walking but it was pretty fun to just wander around looking at things. Mimi and Mary are definitely very exploratory so i just followed around and tried not to trip or fall down. I was surprised by the amount of culture bursting out of both cities. Edinburgh is a very architecturally diverse city and Glasgow is a more low key but they are both very interesting places. Oh, we went to a plaid factory complete with working looms. “Tartan is the new black.”
Oh, also saw a British movie on Friday night called Gosford Park (with an all star cast of English actors, plus Ryan Phillippe). It was a really good movie and incredibly funny but in a very British way. British humor is great, it’s more much more subtle and cutting than what Americans generally laugh at. Sarcasm is lost in America but the British dig it. I doubt the movie will ever make it to the states but it was really good.
We cooked dinner on Sunday and went to a really small pub at night to watch The Simpsons. The pub was dank, dark, mildewy and smoky but i liked it alot and we sat around playing with candle wax (the only source of illumination) and talking for a few hours. To cap the night we played the British version of Taboo, called Articulate (but there were no taboo words, just really really hard to describe things) and this other game i’ll have to show you guys. Oh, and FMK was spread once again. Since we didn’t know a whole lot of the same people, we eventually used celebrities and stuff and that was really funny. (Think “Gandhi, the Pope, Billy Graham” or “Barbra Streisand, Martha Stewart, Connie Cheung”) All of Mary’s roommates love Benicio Del Toro. I was subjected to many “Benicio in ballhuggers” and “Benicio in leather chaps” conversations.
To end this too long blog, the week was really good and it was refreshing to be out of England and to get a taste of the road and especially great to be in an environment with people around my age. I had a dope time in Glasgow and i was sad to leave but i know that in a week i’m out of the UK so i’ll suck it up.
Anyhow, Friday and Saturday were exploring days. Me, Mary and Mimi (one of Mary’s roommates) tried to go see the Necropolis (essentially a giant big graveyard) in Glasgow but it was closed so we explored the church and the museum. It was a small religious museum and it was small but filled with interesting things, it also had the original of a Dali painting of Jesus on the cross that is really dope. Saturday, we took the bus to Edinburgh and walked around all over the place to look at sites like Edinburgh Castle, the Scottish Crown Jewels (including the “Stone of Destiny” which was basically a very underwhelming chunk of rock. Whee), part of what was supposed to be a copy of the Parthenon (but it ran out of funding and now it’s just a couple of big Roman columns), the tomb of philosopher David Hume and the nearby pubs and streets. It was a long day of walking but it was pretty fun to just wander around looking at things. Mimi and Mary are definitely very exploratory so i just followed around and tried not to trip or fall down. I was surprised by the amount of culture bursting out of both cities. Edinburgh is a very architecturally diverse city and Glasgow is a more low key but they are both very interesting places. Oh, we went to a plaid factory complete with working looms. “Tartan is the new black.”
Oh, also saw a British movie on Friday night called Gosford Park (with an all star cast of English actors, plus Ryan Phillippe). It was a really good movie and incredibly funny but in a very British way. British humor is great, it’s more much more subtle and cutting than what Americans generally laugh at. Sarcasm is lost in America but the British dig it. I doubt the movie will ever make it to the states but it was really good.
We cooked dinner on Sunday and went to a really small pub at night to watch The Simpsons. The pub was dank, dark, mildewy and smoky but i liked it alot and we sat around playing with candle wax (the only source of illumination) and talking for a few hours. To cap the night we played the British version of Taboo, called Articulate (but there were no taboo words, just really really hard to describe things) and this other game i’ll have to show you guys. Oh, and FMK was spread once again. Since we didn’t know a whole lot of the same people, we eventually used celebrities and stuff and that was really funny. (Think “Gandhi, the Pope, Billy Graham” or “Barbra Streisand, Martha Stewart, Connie Cheung”) All of Mary’s roommates love Benicio Del Toro. I was subjected to many “Benicio in ballhuggers” and “Benicio in leather chaps” conversations.
To end this too long blog, the week was really good and it was refreshing to be out of England and to get a taste of the road and especially great to be in an environment with people around my age. I had a dope time in Glasgow and i was sad to leave but i know that in a week i’m out of the UK so i’ll suck it up.
I spent a few days traveling around with the sales manager for the company. Robin and I drove around and made a few calls and he filled me in on how the field sales of the company went. Robin was a really cool guy and was really laid back and i got along with him really really well. I got into Manchester on Monday night and then proceeded to places like Leeds, Hamilton, Bolton, Newcastle, Glasgow and Edinburgh for the next three days. I got to see all sorts of flute shops and it was very interesting to actually see a sales call in action. Most of all though, i really enjoyed cruising around with Robin, talking about random things, most of which were unrelated to the business. He had a real chill attitude and i was really relaxed and learned alot but also had a great amount of fun.
Monday, February 4, 2002
WTF!!! The Patriots won?!? Wholly cow. Somebody please say they taped it. Bill Belichick is a genius. Wow.
The Curse of Jimmy is still alive and well but i'll let him tell it. Anyhow, i'm off to Northern England where the winds are blowing at 80+ mph and people are dying. Fun.
The Curse of Jimmy is still alive and well but i'll let him tell it. Anyhow, i'm off to Northern England where the winds are blowing at 80+ mph and people are dying. Fun.
Sunday, February 3, 2002
So Jimmy made it out here this weekend, after some minor delays. He came in Friday night and then we slept in till like one the next day. I was supposed to go with Jean-Paul to a flute thing but he was cool and said that i really didn’t have to if i had a “mate in town.” So we took the day and ran into London to explore the sights. Basically we went to Piccadilly Circus and wandered around trying to think of something to do. We shopped a little bit and then went into an arcade to play video games. Without knowing it, this was the very same area that i’d explored two years ago with Lynn, Hong and Connie. (Remember that stamp sticker picture thing Conehead? They had it but it was broken!). Anyhow, we wandered around Leicester Square, Covent Garden and Piccadilly Circus. It looks just like Times Square basically and the people are just as friendly and accomodating. Me and Jimmy decided that all cities are pretty much the same...boring.
Anyhow, we stopped into Virgin Records and HMV to look at magazines for a club or a lounge. Of course i wanted a hip hop place (i even called Mandisa all the way from here in a valiant attempt to find a cool place) but that’s pretty much an impossibility and after a few futile attempts, we actually happened to wander by a Bar Free that was pumping hip hop. The music was great but the place was tiny so we had to go because it was just people sitting around drinking. We wandered across the street to Zoo Bar and we popped downstairs only to find wack music. Actually, it wasn’t horrible but it wasn’t inspiring by any means. The place was nice but it just wasn’t fun and Jimmy wasn’t feeling romantic so we didn’t dance. So with nothing left we just decided to go to Chinatown to get some food, where we indulged in that highly amusing game, FMK.
So, that was our day in London. Video games, a few drinks, some food and about $50 spent doing absolutely nothing. The capper was the train home which was delayed forty minutes because some drunkard had puked in one of the cars. So, people kept on piling into the train and it was like sardines in a can and everyone smelled and basically it was like hell. England is great. Europe is great. At least i had Jimmy here to share boredom together.
Anyhow, we stopped into Virgin Records and HMV to look at magazines for a club or a lounge. Of course i wanted a hip hop place (i even called Mandisa all the way from here in a valiant attempt to find a cool place) but that’s pretty much an impossibility and after a few futile attempts, we actually happened to wander by a Bar Free that was pumping hip hop. The music was great but the place was tiny so we had to go because it was just people sitting around drinking. We wandered across the street to Zoo Bar and we popped downstairs only to find wack music. Actually, it wasn’t horrible but it wasn’t inspiring by any means. The place was nice but it just wasn’t fun and Jimmy wasn’t feeling romantic so we didn’t dance. So with nothing left we just decided to go to Chinatown to get some food, where we indulged in that highly amusing game, FMK.
So, that was our day in London. Video games, a few drinks, some food and about $50 spent doing absolutely nothing. The capper was the train home which was delayed forty minutes because some drunkard had puked in one of the cars. So, people kept on piling into the train and it was like sardines in a can and everyone smelled and basically it was like hell. England is great. Europe is great. At least i had Jimmy here to share boredom together.
Friday, February 1, 2002
I am my smiling, crescent shaped, magically disappearing eyes.
Jimmy called me yesterday from Belgium and said that he was gonna try to come visit. Today. Dope. Tickets are really cheap right now so if things go well i will have a friend out here in a few hours. We won't do anything but moan and gripe but it'll be fun doing it together. I am supposed to go to a flute thing tomorrow so he'll probably have to come to that and be bored but hey.....
Jimmy called me yesterday from Belgium and said that he was gonna try to come visit. Today. Dope. Tickets are really cheap right now so if things go well i will have a friend out here in a few hours. We won't do anything but moan and gripe but it'll be fun doing it together. I am supposed to go to a flute thing tomorrow so he'll probably have to come to that and be bored but hey.....
