imagine that you were stranded on a deserted island, devoid of tools, water, food and non-indigenous assets of any kind. and you arrive with very few clothing ensembles. which pair of friends would u want besides you? i¡¯ve had this conversation a few times (the first time at ecasu) and my answer remains the same. but first. the criteria:



these people i¡¯m taking with me must be capable, reliable people. they are there to ensure my survival and my comfort. they need to be able to make fire, they need to be able to hunt moving animals. they need to provide all the comforts of home on our little island. if they can make a television out of bamboo, so much the better. plus, they should be able to fend off rabid animals. they need to be the swiss army knives of survival. and if they¡¯re willing to pee on me in the event of a jellyfish attack, so much the better.



some people automatically get eliminated. those who would bitch too much (jimmy, adam, kyle, you¡¯re out). they cannot devour all the consumables (louis). if you can¡¯t swim, no need to apply (names withheld to avoid embarrassment). most girls, just by association, get eliminated. although there are a few exceptions, mainly of the michigander persuasion (except for those who have lived in ann arbor). for some reason, michigan girls are generally more capable of survival. maybe it¡¯s something in the water. maybe it¡¯s the frigid air. girls are just hardier out there.



my worst case scenario deserted island friends to take along would be: james and hong. i think they would both do the job quite well. i would live to see another day with their skills by my side. james might get the edge because he can make plantain pancakes. and he could make a neat little aquarium with the non-edible fish. there are a few candidates that i have no objections towards, but since i¡¯m limiting myself to two people, they are alternates (victor, brian), mainly due to the lack of cooking ability that i¡¯ve seen. actually, ameer is highly recommended but i¡¯ve never seen him make anything yet. so he can be a honorable mention.



and if i had to take two girls, i would go with karina (she¡¯s an architect, she must build nice shelters) and anna (what doesn¡¯t she do exactly?). the cheung¡¯s would be top contenders except i know for a fact that they are novice swimmers. so i¡¯ll take whichever one makes it out of the shipwreck as an alternate. after those four, all girls are pretty much eliminated. west coast girls and east coast girls just seem¡­.un-survivable. no offense.



the absolute worst person to be stuck on a deserted island with (assuming day-to-day survival is an issue): je-yi. i¡¯ve seen the bottles of hair products arrayed by height on your shelf je-yi, you would never make it on my rough and tumble island. but then again, neither would i. that¡¯s why i need two friends.