my hands are small, i know, but they're not yours they are my own. this is serious business i'm about to talk about so buckle up and get ready. wipe the smirks off your faces because i'm very very serious right now. very serious. everyone needs to, absolutely needs to, get some industrial sized hand sanitizer right now (is my repeating of phrases starting to annoy anyone? it's starting to annoy me i think). purell is to hand sanitizer as kleenex is to kleenex. the answer is c. see all the people in asia dropping like flies from this atypical pneumonia. derek has done some fine reporting from the far east and we need to heed his warning. don't think that this problem is just contained to planet asia. there are some seventy suspected cases of atypical pneumonia right in our very own country. fourteen in california. fourteen brother. one and four mashed together. that is alot. double digits man. like whoa.



don't be ashamed to pull that clear sanitizing shit out of your handbag/clutch/purse. it's a matter of safety. if you travel in urban areas and touch alot of people, use that hand sanitizer like it's the last thing between you and a mini-you. or perhaps a used-to-be you. you think i am exagerrating. i am not. if anything, i am controlled and with it. absolutely.



learn to scrub scrub scrub those germs and viruses away. nothing is better than removing 99.9% of your germs. sure it may make your hands smell like alchohol, or leave your skin all dry and sensitive, it may even kill some "good" germs, but forget those minor inconveniences. we're on the public safety tip here. if hand sanitizer can save the world, why not use it? come to think of it, buying some stock in purell may not be a bad idea either. i will personally purchase enough hand sanitizer to triple the stock in the upcoming week. i know people feel me on this one. je-yi especially. if you ain't clean, you ain't clean. that's an axiom for the twenty first century.



this is not a joke. this is not a public service announcement. this is serious. serious like cancer. serious like bubonic plague. serious like the flu epidemic of 1918. oh right, and there's a war going on somewhere in the world too. and there's a wee rabbit running free willy style around my garage. i'm not sure if it's confused or missing or dead or just pooping in my shoes. i left the garage open in hopes it would run out but how can you be sure that the wildlife has exited the room? not until you smell the rotting carcass will you know for sure. freak me.



disclaimer: i am not being paid to push purell brand hand sanitizer. my opinion is non-coerced and bias free. this does not however mean that i am closed to the idea of being paid for using purell products. in case anyone has that kind of clout. stay clean and sanitary people. peace.