so drink this through your pointed teeth and critique it. in looking for new careers, i think i've found one i might like. it will start like this. someone will put out a product -- a film, a cd, a book, a restaurant, a child, whatever. someone will be paid to review it and thus attempt to direct public attention towards or away from the product. i will then come swooping in and be paid vast sums of money to review the reviews. i will be the watchdog that makes sure the reviewers are being honest and fair. in this manner, i won't actually have to disseminate or analyze any new information -- since i am wholly incapable of doing this intelligently. all i have to do is gather all the reviews and then make a few useful comments about them. i'd sort of be like a rotten tomato. this would be a very useful service because people can just come to me for a consensus review of a product, as well as ask me my opinion on the trustworthiness of certain reviewers. isn't it great?



and once people start reviewing me and my reviews, i will just go over the top of them and start reviewing them and their reviews of me! this job will be similar to the world's oldest profession in that you just can't ever run out of targets. now, what would this position be called? nothing as simple as "reviewer of reviews" i'm sure. i'm thinking maybe my business card should say "review amalgamator" or "aggregate reviewer", either of which would be nice. maybe just "the final word." although that is already a tv show i think. i might need to go with something more original. then again, the whole point of this particular job is that i don't have to be original at all. i can just piggyback on the works of others.



i'm so brilliant sometimes i (confuse) amuse (only) myself.