hot days, frigid nights. good cheesy title for something eh? not really. but it's the truth. the san diego of my memory has been replaced by this odd non-perfect weather we've been getting. pulling on sweatshirts, layering clothes, shivering in cold cars. these are not things associated with san diego. i try to travel always with a big blanket in my trunk, in case it gets exceptionally cold somewhere and someone starts freezing their arses off. call me consideration.



i was thinking about how friends have become family. and for some people, friends are more family than actual blood family. while this may be a sad state of affairs, it's kind of true. moms and dads and sisters and brothers are irreplaceable but now friends take such a prominent role in people's lives. people you grew up with, people you've told things to, people you're ultra-comfortable with, they become your family. and i've realized that sometimes what's missing (at least in my life) is that older person role. the parental figure who checks you and tells you when you shouldn't be doing something. friends are very supportive but as peers, they often have only so much maturity and wisdom to impart. and if you aren't that tight with your parents, where do you get the "mature" angle from?



who will watch you and guide you and help you along? it's gotta be someone who doesn't antagonize and nag you (thus ruling out parentals) but rather has walked a path before you and can point out the roadblocks. i don't have these kinds of people in my life. usually, i'm older or at the same age as anybody i'm close with. not that i'm really looking for a "mature" angle. i guess it's part of being conceited but i feel like my wisdom is good enough (realizing full well of course that it's not). i don't really like authority figures and people who tell me what to do. or tell me what they think i should do. i zone them out and unless i really respect them, i hardly think about what they have to say to me. i've had some older brotherly types in my life but they were more for fun purposes, and they were in no position to crack down on me.



do i need such a person? i'm inclined to think not. but in the family unit that friends have become, there seems to be a gaping hole in the "parent" role. then again, can friends fill that role? wisdom isn't age exclusive by any means so maybe one never needs that older person perspective. maybe i'll find out. maybe i wont.