in trying to explain the male gender to a friend a while back, i happened to utter these words, "whenever a guy talks to you, the only thing he really wants to know is.....do you have a boyfriend?" not brilliant of course because this is an obvious statement. but i have to extend my previous statement to include that "whenever anyone first talk talks to you, the only thing they want to know is if you have a boy/girlfriend."



this could be out of pure curiousity but 80% of the time, it is for personal gain. by asking this simple question, the dynamics of a conversation can change dramatically. sometimes, people whip it out early, to set the tone. sometimes, they try to slip it in after you've already had some good conversation. sometimes, in an uncomfortable silence, you bust it out just to clear the air because by asking this question you open up a whole new area of conversation, good for at least another ten minutes. a bonus here is that by talking about "relationships" you're guaranteed a decent talk and you feel like this person has "let you in."



the whole world is scamming. don't lie. don't deny. the only difference is to what degree. what happens in the generic male's mind when this question is answered is that the girl is immediately "available" or "not available." this fact subtly changes things. if things have been going well and the answer is, "yes i have a boyfriend," then a guy silently curses. if the answer is: (1) no, i don't (2) sort of (3) not really (4) yes i do and he's far far away, then the conversation continues as before and the guy starts to pay more attention. nothing really matters to a male besides, "boyfriend or no?"



i personally deny this innate curiousity. i've decided that i will try to avoid asking this question in any circumstance. it seems trite. i'd rather let the dark cloud of "do you have a girlfriend" hang over a conversation forever. using this question to gain more conversation or more knowledge seems too....whats the word.....i don't know. i want to let the mystery drag on and on. why not wait to ask when the question is actually relevant? then again, some people might argue that the question is relevant as soon as you meet someone. i think i just defeated my own argument. i just pulled a gaga.