i think i've proved myself a bit this past week. to my uncles, to whoever is keeping an eye out for me. they worry about my laziness, my lack of dedication. is it wrong to want to ease into things? i dont want to make THIS my life yet. i don't think there is enough in the flute industry, the business industry, to make me feel complete or challenged. making money is good. getting better is good. growing up is good. fighting a never ending war and slowly dying by mental stagnation is not.