lady is a tramp. it's tough to be a female isn't it? to balance that fine line between being womanly but not obscenely girly? a friend recently pointed out to me that she thinks i suffer from an issue of being attracted to females who look a certain way (cosmoplitan and feminine) but really desire an intellectual woman who has a stronger force of personality and tastes that may not be in line with traditional images of beauty. which is not to say that one can't be intellectually deep, cosmopolitan, and feminine at the same time, but it's just a rare combination to find. my friend pointed out that often times with people, what you see is what you get. so if i insist on being attracted to women who look a certain way, then i shouldn't be surprised when they turn out to be more focused on the superficial or have standards that conform to the classic views of relationships and life. after all, if someone buys into the ideal of a typical (societally indoctrinated) female, then that should also indicate their (typical) mindset to an extent right?

i'm still working this one out in my head. if this is true, then it could explain some things in my life. if it's not true, it's still something to ponder and discuss.

anyway, i'm watching a recent episode of made where a belching, farting, dirty slob of a girl wishes to be made into a lady -- in time for her sister's bridal shower. what we have here is a college-aged female who is a classic "one of the guys." her male friends declare that they would never date her because she exudes no accoutrements of feminitiy. an hour of reality tv time later, marissa becomes a well coifed, beautifully coutured, and daintily behaved princess.

boys suddenly notice her, she goes on a real date, her sister is "so proud of her." life changing stuff.

this brought me to the realization that even though men always express admiration and (momentary) interest in a girl who can "be a guy," they inevitably return to the sanitized conformist image of a girl who has a bit of refinement and sex appeal. women aren't just men with attention enhancing chest attachments; they are a different, and potentially very lovely, creature altogether.

men are still attracted to women who are, well, women. i know females all around the world realize this. maybe i'm a little late to the party but any females who are reading this are going "duh." but after my friend's "insight/accusation" and watching this episode of made, i'm really starting to think about what makes me/us attracted to certain females. it may not be anything as mysterious as pheromones or as obvious as physical attraction; it could be very much in the way someone walks or talks. and if she walks and talks like a dude, then you'll probably end up treating -- and thinking -- of her as an undateable dude.