friend-potism. my mom used to (and probably still does) think that my hanging out with friends all the time was a total waste of effort and commitment. as i ran around conducting my approximation of a social life, she would constantly say things like "it's good to have friends, but they won't be able to help you get a place to stay, money, food, or a job." she liked to say this when i was near absolute zero on my life monitor. she chided me for focusing too much on hanging out and not enough on the important things in life -- like you know, providing the basic necessities for an adult life.

well, i don't want to say that she's wrong but of late i've decided that having your own built-in craigslist can almost be better than actually putting in the effort to improve yourself. case in point. all of my adult life jobs (heck, all of my jobs) have pretty much come from friends.

my first real job, at a pharmaceutical company, came courtesy of a family friend. my second job at a video game company, courtesy of a friend of a friend. i literally had to go see this mysterious "james wong" the first day of work and say to him "hi, i'm jon, thanks for letting me use your name to get myself hired. i said we're great friends, let's be." and most recently, i've become an underling of hong's. no muss, no fuss. he just hired me. oh and let's not forget, i was able to write a book mainly through the labors and work of a friend slash agent for life. see how easy it is mom? through friends i've acquired many a job, which has led to money and food.

the only exceptions to this rule have been my cafe job at michigan and my two semi-jobs in new york city. when i first moved there i knew nobody useful in the city so i had to be somewhat proactive in acquiring work. i got a callback and internship with the first company i applied with, the now defunct a.magazine. and then i contacted some random video editor guy online and he hooked me up with a video editing company -- which lasted until they went off to film a jon bon jovi documentary three months later. as if. jeff turboff, if you're out there, many thanks. so outside of those three instances, i've used and abused friend privileges to get where i am today.

the only jobs that i've acquired based on my own merits are ones that were either essentially non-paid or ones where you are all hired during a group interview. they say that 75% of jobs are acquired through referrals and such. i'd have to agree. if you know someone on the inside, it's much easier to land a job.

i've had one other job that i forgot to mention. it was doing flute related stuff for my dad's company, which was really just straight up nepotism. which, i think, is an excellent holdover from feudal times. or whenever nepotism was at its height. i'm all for nepotism quite honestly.

of course, never in my working career (it's laughable to term it a career actually) have i been granted a salary or made more than $12/hour, but that may not be indicative of the types of jobs that friends can get you, since it might say more about my marketable skills, or lack thereof. i'm not complaining about this fact, just pointing it out since this post should not be construed as a recommendation to smooge off friends for life. i want to dissauge my impressionable young fans who might hang on my every word. "get a real job that you earn kids, it'll make you healthy, wealthy, and wise."

my mom also takes a hard stance against me moving home so there have been a few times where i've had to look for places to live. every time, i've been fortunate enough to have a friend offer to let me stay with them. thanks friends. if ever i'm in a position to help you out, you just tell me and i'll be sure to pass on the request to a friend of mine so that they can help you out too. pass it forward as they say.