revenge of the geeks. "i wouldn't mind get my ears surgically modified (to be pointy, like spock). i've always wanted to be different and that would be a great way to set myself apart." we watched trekkies last night. i learned a few things. not only about star trek fans, but about the other people that we share this fine universe with. first off, trekkie fans aren't weird. they're no different than anyone else obsessed with a particular hobby. you don't think DJs and music collectors are weird? i'm sure you could slap together a documentary about some pretty weird music fans.

and, as pointed out in the documentary, what's so different about a guy wearing his star trek uniform on a daily basis versus a guy who wears his football team's jersey? not that much if you get to the bottom of it. the only difference is the mocking and snickers that a star trek "jersey" would receive if you saw someone wearing it in a grocery store?

you gotta love'em, these trekkies. they're people who have consciously decided to align themselves with the geekiest of the geeks. star trek could be one of the greatest shows ever made but the majority of earth's population only think of trekkies as dorks, geeks and nerds. nobody mocks the rappers who have scarface posters in every room. nobody says "oh, i love the godfather movies" with a hint of embarassment. but if you say that you're a star trek fan, be prepared to defend yourself. set your phazers to "kill."

why are some geeky obsessions cool? what's the difference between being a star wars fan versus a star trek fan? in the hierarchy of cool, star wars wins hands down. star wars is universally acknowledged as geeky but it's still cool. why? are the star wars movies and characters really that much cooler than the star trek characters? are there hotter girls in star wars? no no and no. and lord of the rings fans, is there anything innately cool about them? hell no. but yet, if you said you were learning to speak elvish and got your ears surgically pointed like an elf -- as opposed to a vulcan -- you might be considered cool. okay, maybe not. but compare learning elvish to learning klingon, one is cool, the other very uncool.

does it take something going mainstream to make it acceptably cool? no, because star trek's made the mainstream and they've made billions of dollars, but they still haven't gotten any respect.

then again, what about comics? comics used to be geek but are slowly gaining cool cred, mainly due to mainstreaming. before, if you read comics you kind of had to talk quietly about it. now, with comic book movies popping up every summer, comics are becoming pretty cool. i mean, unless the movie sucks, in which case you might be embarassed to be a big fan of a bad movie adaptation. say, a daredevil or a captain america. but when semi-obscure comics like ghost rider, blade, hellboy and sin city are hitting the big time, it inflates the cool value of all comics across the board.

so what happened with star trek? is the novelty factor over? was it always a lead in for a geek joke? did william shatner kill the star trek star? i need to know these things to know which geek trends to align myself with for maximum future coolness. i mean, if x-men is now cool, i'm glad i aligned with them at a young age, but will magic or d&d move up in cool class if they get bigger? if poker can hit the big time and make the big bucks, can magic? when does the geek side transition to the cool side?

so far my rule of thumb for totally uncool things to do is this: when answering what you did on a saturday night, if the answer gets an eyebrow raise and an incredulous mocking laugh, you're probably not too cool. if you're afraid to admit to what you did on a saturday night, you're probably in uncool territory.

despite what seems like insurmountable geek prejudice, i know hope floats. video games used to be pretty geeky. but twenty years later, it's now mainstream and a serious billion dollar industry. but even within videogames, only certain games are acceptable. sports games, racing games, fighting games and violent stuff like grand theft auto are socially acceptable. but start to collect fanboy collectibles like the life sized yoshi and you're thrust right back into geekland. maybe there's no escaping it, geekism exists; it's just as debilitating as sexism, racism and all the other -isms, but people don't recognize it as a serious problem. well, i do.

let's work together for a better world, where geeks can join the normal people, and trekkies can wear their uniforms proudly without fear of harassment or being the butt of jokes. i have a dream...