goodwill hunting. really, what is the difference between talking to a complete stranger versus talking to a person who is essentially a stranger? say you lost a good friend and found them again five years later. you have the conversation that is labeled the "catch up conversation." is any of it different than the "getting to you know you conversation?" nope. minus a few names from the past and a few "oh who do you still talk to's" and "do you still do these's," there's really no difference.



or actually there is a difference but it's all mental. the difference between talking to complete strangers and essentially strangers is goodwill. for essentially strangers, you're opening up to them and receiving them warmly because you have some measure of goodwill towards them. they may have become your mortal enemy in the last five years but until you figure that out, you treat them with a certain degree of friendliness.



but really, the actions that you're undertaking with essentially strangers will be the exact same ones that you take with complete strangers. so why not treat complete strangers the same? at least the ones that seem to give off a positive vibe?



if you go to a gathering and some seemingly complete stranger comes up to you and says that they know you from back in the day -- and you barely remember them at all -- the mere fact that they say they know you and you kind of know them changes the whole dynamics of the thing. suddenly it's like you're almost friends, for no good reason other than some vague recollections.



should we be treating essentially strangers like complete strangers? or maybe the other way around, treating complete strangers as essentially strangers and give everyone the benefit of goodwill? is that just too dangerous? is the issue at hand not goodwill but actually intent? do we treat complete strangers differently because they possibly have malicious intent while essentially strangers probably have nothing worse in mind but some forced catching up?