People's Instinctive Travels

So the other night Mary's back in San Diego and so bored after only two days here that she's been watching Hannah Montana marathons. By her calculations we haven't seen each other in about two years. And it's not like we keep in touch via phone or emails either. That sounds like way too long of a span to go without knowing what the other person was up to, especially since she's been a long time member of my inner circle of five. Then again, this is pretty much how my close friendships work. Out of sight, out of mind. "Let's catch up!"

Last time I saw her I was on the verge of moving up to the Bay (for an ultimately unsuccessful shot at a relationship). She's been a bit more productive, atttending The Woodrow Wilson School of Public and International Affairs -- that's in Princeton by the way. No, I have no idea what that is either but she tried to fill me in and explain what all these bright brilliant people have been studying. Future leaders and accomplished folk of all sorts were her classmates apparently. I'm gonna say that Mary's moved up a little bit in the world, just a little.

The funny thing is that getting yogurt in Convoy while watching the new but hardly improved generation of young Asians around us brought her right back to high school. Instant time warp. We joked that she'd achieved but look at where she ended up. Right back next to my unaccomplished drifter ass. Of course, Mary wasn't supposed to be here for long. Her life plans were taking her to Sudan the next day as part of some United Nations thing to save the world or something. But a little matter of the International Criminal Court going after the president of Sudan for war crimes and genocide prevented that. So yup, she's stuck back here with me. By the way, it took me a second to recognize that the whole Darfur thing was in Sudan.

There was a time when I felt like I was a total world traveler. A few countries in Asia, a few months lived abroad, two or three trips around Europe. That qualified as getting around. Well, that's nothing nowadays. People are all over the place. You haven't traveled if you haven't gone three weeks (inevitably alone) through some country I've never heard of or couldn't point out on a map. It's just disgusting these people. Western Europe and Northern Asia are just so quaint now. Try South America, Southeast Asia, Eastern Europe, Africa. I used to get travel updates from Mary about how she'd just almost died riding a chicken bus in Peru or something like that. Even acquaintances I've met recently have all been super well travelled. I feel so provincial. I'm not sure I've always bought into travelling as a way to adventure but it's such a necessary thing to feel like you're alive and doing something nowadays.

Makes for better stories at social gatherings too.

During our reunion night, at a coffee shop with wonky Internet, we did a pictorial review of our last two years. Hers spent in school and traveling, mine spent in various California locales. My life update took maybe five minutes. The rest of our night was spent taking a virtual tour of the dating scene in San Diego, New York, and San Francisco. Three hours spent cruising Match trying to figure out where the best places to start dating would be. The criteria we used was simple. Basic attractive looks and a semi-interesting profile. Humor a plus. I was able to prove to Mary that you could really just screen people by favorite books.

What else did we learn? Get the hell out of San Diego. The overall selection is thin thin thin. Sure everyone is laid back, down to earth, and loves the outdoors but what the hell else do they do? New York was interesting because by changing the zip code to Manhattan or Brooklyn (and narrowing the search radius) you could get totally different options. Everyone in Brooklyn read. Everyone's profile was full of pizzazz and pseudo-intelligent sparkle. San Diego, in comparison, was like the dumbest blonde on Earth. San Francisco was a mix of high finance and uber-geek. Tough call.

We ended the night watching Michael Jackson dance videos because with old friends you gotta bring it back. Plus he's The King of Pop. And who could have predicted that seven years after they shared the stage Britney would be worse off than Michael? Goodness. That clip also contains some of the worst MJ involved choreo I've ever seen.