Day 178

It's been a packed week of SF and I've been quite the industrious little helper. I helped George run a few car errands, I bought blazing 150 watt light bulbs for her lamps so we can have enough light to read by (I hate wishy washy lights when reading, it makes me sleepy), I huffed and puffed a few things into Amy's new apartment, and I was Dann's little elf when did he ran his speed dating thing. Plus I set up Jaz with Twitter. Who's next?!

Clearly I've had not much to do this week so any group activities people suggest, I'm in for. It annoys George that I don't group reply, to which I answer, "I'm coming, it's a given. What else do I have to do?" When my days actually fill up with things to do that don't involve group hanging out or dinners and such, I'll be sure to hit that Reply All button. My general policy is to just email the person organizing and say I'm coming. I don't know why but it's similar to my anti-responding-to-Evite policy. I don't reply to Evites unless absolutely necessary, and sometimes not even then. I'm not sure why this is but I hope I have a good rational reason for it somewhere. Maybe not. It could be a totally annoying social faux pas actually.

If it is, maybe I need to Tact Papers myself. "Stop pretending like you're more important than other people and reply all/respond already. Asshole." Oh related news, Lilly and I's long talked about fun project just got off the ground. Tact Papers: When you don't know what to say, we'll say it for you! Please? It's still in beta, or maybe even alpha, but we're taking requests now.

I've also been trolling Meetup and Craigslist for activities and groups. I need to find a life fast and it begins with finding some fellow writers. So far I've sent out queries to a few writing groups that are meeting next week, I've signed up for an art history salon on Friday mornings (we'll see if I ever wake up for that one), I'm working up the courage to volunteer or workshop at 826 Valencia, and I'm hoping to check out a few writing organizations and maybe even take a class or two. And of course there's book clubs and board game nights to explore. I may have to introduce the Bay to Squabble, one handful of people at a time. I'm hoping to be the Johnny Appleseed of that movement.

Here's the thing I'm realizing about looking for other writers: I'm realizing that it's going to be unlikely that I can find a group that's predominantly 20s-30s unless I go ahead and start one -- which I'll try to do I think. Everyone I've contacted this week has seemed to be older than me, sometimes by a lot. While there's a lot to be said for a diverse range of age, experience, and interests, I guess I'm still stuck in this idea that the people I would like to talk books and writing with would be people I might also be friends with. I need to separate out those two things. Friends are friends and writers are writers. If the two should dovetail that would be awesome but by limiting myself to some idea of a similarly aged peer writing group, I'm probably closing off multiple avenues of exploration. I need to get over my age-ism, quick.

I read about this one semi-famous spot in SF where writers of all types gather every week and they just read aloud to one another. Bring in up to six pages of work, read it to the group, and then shut up while they critique it and offer opinions. How scary is that? I gotta do it one of these days. Gotta.

Two years ago I went to this planning retreat for an Asian-American arts showcase, to get some information about being involved for the fall exhibitions, but I couldn't follow through because I left the Bay soon afterwards. Now I'm hoping to jump in there again, and try to stick around for a few events and to work behind the scenes on something with other people. Bring some of that old college collaboration back. I miss things like that. If there's one thing I really think post-college life needs, it's a project to get involved with. It's something I wish you could do with just friends. Pick a hobby or a project and just sit around and do that with your free time. I love hang out time and social outings but there's also more too right? I like leaders, I like followers, I like group dynamics, I like unified goals, I like teams, I like accomplishment.

Dann was kind enough to give me the chance to watch him do his speed dating thing (there's a post about observing the actual event coming soon, it was quite fascinating and educational). He's started running some speed dating nights and it involves setting up the venue, hosting the event, and then all the post-organization stuff like logging matches, posting photos, etc. It's always fun times watching a friend be in charge. I like it when friends are in charge. It's a side of people you don't usually get to see -- unless you went to college or worked together -- and it totally reveals a new side of them.

Please invite me to come visit you at work or any activities where you're in charge. I'll be unobtrusive, I promise. Plus I take directions well and am an excellent helper. References available upon request.