Walk the Line

Here's the thing about work friends: I usually avoid them. In just about every job I've ever had, I've kept a safe distance from any co-worker. Not because none of them have been cool or worthy of knowing as people, but because it's just weird to get close to co-workers. I mean, doing the drink thing after work, talking about your personal life, mixing business with pleasure, that's just all weird.

However, with my current job, by the nature of it, we're allowed to be a little more relaxed as far as our relationships with co-workers go. For one thing, my fellow managers are amazingly cool -- inside or outside of work. And since everyone spends 12+ hours a day together, it's natural to want to get along when each day feels like a lifetime.

However, when there are heads to butt, or business type things to deal with, it can become a barrier when you're friends on the side. It's not that separating friendship and business is difficult but it's definitely a different way of approaching things. I'm naturally inclined to befriend everyone around me, mainly because it's better (not to mention more fun) to be around people you like. But when you have to judge people on their work personas versus their regular personas, it can kind of get mixed. A great person doesn't necessarily make a great worker.

Especially when you get into the area of supervisor versus supervisee. While being friendly with your superiors is never a bad thing, there's always that cloud hanging over your relationship that when it comes down to it, one person can dramatically alter the "friendship" by firing the other party. Usually this isn't a problem at all. With most co-workers, it's usually safest to get close to those you trust and respect anyway. The distance is there for people who aren't likely to be around, or for individuals who aren't that savory in either respect.

But to have this artificial barrier of work hanging over a potential friendship is strange for me. Where's the separation? Does hanging out after work make sense if you're just going to see them again in eight hours? Is it possible to build a relationship that isn't work related? Of course, many normal people consistently find their friends through a work place so clearly the answer is "Yes".

I just don't really like having to evaluate someone based on the normal factors plus this weird grey area of "are they good workers?" It certainly adds a new dimension to the term "value add," which we use to judge people in a typical social circle. It may be time to bust out the friendship report card and make some work-centric modifications in order to create the "Are you my perfect co-worker?" test.