sorry, we can't validate your parking for a pack of gum. as we do this whole life thing, we're always looking for support, for validation. validation for us as people, for our ideas, for our theories, for the way we live our particular lives. i wonder what it feels like then, to have no validation. to have an idea or a way of doing things that nobody else understands. usually, even if i'm on crack, i find or encounter something that validates what i'm saying or thinking or feeling. be it person book or another form of communication. but i would guess that sometimes, there are things that we think, that are based so much on our own experiences, that nobody can validate them. and at that point what happens? i don't know.



maybe we give up that idea, and question what might be wrong with "me." or we forge ahead alone and bear the torch of a single shining idea, looking for validation but not really expecting it. people need to be validated though. people need to have support. it doesn't have to be blatant "clap clap, good job" support but just an acceptance at least. to find even just that one person who can say honestly "i feel you," lends so much strength and hope.



but many great men and women have struggled on with no validation, with no support, and achieved great transcendent things. how do they do it? what sorts of inner resources are they accessing to enable them to be classified as truly "my own (wo)man." i would like to find out someday. perhaps not personally, but at least anecdotally.



i've noticed, and have been wanting to compile, a list of things that people say. like questions or comments that people ask, when they are fishing for an answer that they already have. but they want to hear someone else say it. i'm not sure if this is the best example, but like for instance, when someone says "oh, i know your type (of person that you are attracted to)," the stock answer is usually "my type? i don't have a type." and that leads right into a discussion of types and what somebody is or isn't attracted to.



everyone has an idea of what kinds of people they ideally are attracted to -- it may not be a type, but there are traits or generalities at least. but i find that many people are coy with their answers so that they can see how well the other person knows them. or they want to hear what "my type" is from somebody else's perspective. i wish i had a better example of what i'm trying to point out. but i don't right now. i'll keep thinking. it all has something to do with trying to find validation, and then seeing who sees and really "understands" you. it's all a test really.